Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
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