What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
either way he was missing a nipple.
First date. He's wearing a tuxedo shirt and keeps asking me about our future children. Escape plan #3 is now in action...
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
Randomize