Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
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