Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
Randomize
