i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
All the doctor said was why
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
Randomize
