Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
Randomize
