But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
a very overweight girl in the ER just said she trippped over the invisible wii jump rope and fell
sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow
Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
Randomize
