That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
If I ever write a book, i'm calling it "why do i work with fucktards?"
It'll be a good sequel to my other book, "why do i sleep with fucktards?"
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
Randomize
