You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
Randomize
