i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize