In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
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