The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
Randomize
