I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
I just followed up on a noise complaint...only to find 2 girls in bikinis covered in jello with beer cans everywhere. I couldn't bring myself to bust that party.
I want to be a cop.
All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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