But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
I hope mine doesn't look like that
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
I recommend you throw your keys as far as you can in one direction, your phone as far as you can in the opposite direction, and hold on.
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
Randomize
