shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
Randomize
