wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
'valentine' just autocorrected to 'cake robe' in my phone
I think that summarizes my life up pretty accurately
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
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