sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
Well I just put wine in my tea
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Randomize
