Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
Say something about gay babies.
I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
Randomize
