Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
Randomize
