Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
Randomize
