someone owes me an orgasm
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
Dick very happy bro
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Randomize
