I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
Randomize
