Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
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