If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
Randomize
