Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
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