i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
Randomize
