Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
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