What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
Randomize
