question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
It took me fifteen minutes to go from puking on my doorstep infront of my old lady neighbor to legit presentable person able to care for children. Bronzing powder and I deserve an award.
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
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