There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
Just drove past a church with a sign near it that said, "God wants to be your daddy."
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize
