He disabled his match.com account in front of me
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
Randomize