Hey you
You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
OH MY GOD MY UBER DRIVER IS PEEING BEHIND A DUMPSTER
Still got in the car though
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
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