forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
Randomize