I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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