i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
I don't want my vagina anymore.
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
Randomize
