i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
This girl just introduced herself as Queefer Sutherland. She's on a roller derby team. What. The. Fuck.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
Randomize
