after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
She got a boob job, dumped her husband, became a stripper, got a DUI in her Porsche and is now dating her lawyer
I’m making her my life coach if med school doesn’t work out
Randomize
