we have pet lesbian snakes
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
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