I think i sorta joined a cult last night
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
it is 7:54 and i am surrounded by drunk old people. drunk enough that my grandmother and her friend just compared boobs. as in, shirts off, bras coming down. save me.
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
Randomize
