How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
Randomize
