Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
Randomize
