oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
I'm chatting on my fake OkCupid account and watching Lion Witch & Wardrobe on my second screen. Hail me, King of the Creepers
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
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