Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
Randomize
