No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
Randomize
