Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
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