i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
So the doctor told me that I am starting to showing the early signs of liver cirrhosis. Thank you Jack Daniels for making the first 26 years of my life awesome.
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
Randomize
