He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
y did u give ur computer a hand job?
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
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