end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
Meanwhile I am sitting on the couch with a 32 ounce rum and coke trying to decide if I'm too drunk to go get french fries.
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
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