But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
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