it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
Randomize
