If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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